Christmas karaoke

I would be remiss if I didn't post about my recent experience at church. I think, besides weddings and funerals, I haven't been to an actual church service in almost, well if I tell you I'll date myself so let's just say it's been a very, very long time. I felt quite uncomfortable upon entering the church facility for the Christmas Eve service with Darr's extended family.

As luck would have it, we were able to secure upfront seating so I had a clear view of the pastor and the other members of the flock that took to the stage during the night's festivities. (This guy sported the broadest smile ever.) What I realized about two minutes into the opening sermon was the force of these people's convictions. Just as I believe there is no God, these folks believe there is one. Fortunately, the Baptists at this church are relatively gentle with their approach, there was no condemnation of homosexuals or rallying against abortion, just a relatively tame sermon about Jesus and all that he has done for the Christian people. (Of course, I'd hardly expect a fire and brimstone lecture from the pulpit on Christmas Eve.)

The building was nondescript, the inside modestly decorated with white Christmas lights, a tree, a giant wreath on the wall, and some faux presents on the staging area where the pastor spoke and sang. There was a slideshow presentation set to music which underlined the importance of recognizing there was something "missing" from your life, a one-man skit with a very transparent message about missing your "gift" from God, a silent skit where kids re-enacted the virgin birth story (while the story was relayed via voiceover from another kid), and lots and lots of singing. We were sitting and we were standing and we were singing and we were listening to others sing (two folks on stage reminded me of the SNL characters (pictured on the right)). I had no idea traditional Christmas songs like Silent Night and The First Noel had so many verses. Thankfully, the kind folks at the church had a screen by the stage that displayed the lyrics for the audience, giving a karaoke-esque feel to the audience Christmas caroling. I quickly realized that when the "LHBC Lic. # 132159" message displayed on the bottom of the page it meant the song was almost over. Phew.

The unfortunate thing is that I felt like a hypocrite sitting in the church for the hour plus we were there, which made it difficult to just relax and enjoy the service. I made a swift getaway when it was over and very much appreciated the cold, crisp air I sucked in once outside the building. Christianity may work for some but it's definitely not for me.